Caller: My wife and I have been married for 17 years or so but we really haven't been Christians but probably for the last three years of our lives. And as we're getting closer in our relationship with the Lord, He begins to reveal things to us and put things in the context of where we start questioning our married life as well. I guess the best way to put this is right out um- how does the Bible address a sexual relationship between a husband and wife? Over the years, the standard seems to have changed significantly or whatever. I'm just not sure where I would find anything in the Bible regarding that.
Pastor Doug: Well let me address a few themes that the Bible does touch on and maybe one of them will cover part of your question here. The Bible does teach that the purpose for sex is not solely for procreation. If you read the book Song of Solomon, sex is also spoken of as an expression of love and affection.
Another thing is, even though the Bible does tell us that the marriage bed is undefiled, sex is not something the devil invented. It's a blessing of God, it's meant to be a tremendous bonding experience between a husband and wife but even though that be true, it's still possible to have perversion within a married relationship.
There's so much deviant, kinky behavior in our society now I don't think a person thinks just because I've got a marriage license we can be perverted now. And so you know, you have to ask the Holy Spirit to guide you and there are some very qualified Christian sex counselors out there that, or even counselors, that can discuss these things and answer some of your questions. Naturally, since this is a public program and we have families listening in, we don't want to get too explicit.
Caller: Absolutely.
Pastor Doug: Did that cover some of what you were fishing for?
Caller: Yes it did - yes it did.